Fajarasia.id – The marital life of Indonesian model Helwa Bachmid and preacher Habib Bahar bin Smith has become a hot topic among netizens after Helwa shared a deeply emotional confession on her Instagram account, @helwabachmid_.
In her post on Saturday (Nov 15), Helwa revealed the pain she endured during their one-year siri marriage — an unregistered religious marriage — which she described as leaving her feeling like a “spare wife who was abandoned.”
The marriage, according to Helwa, was held modestly on November 15, 2024, without official documentation, relying only on a handwritten contract. “Happy Anniversary, dear. You’ve hidden our marriage for a year, and throughout this year you’ve made my life miserable,” she wrote, as quoted by Redaski on Sunday (Nov 16, 2025).
Emotional Struggles and Disappointment
Helwa expressed her disappointment at not receiving the spiritual guidance she had hoped for from her husband. Instead, she felt treated more like a mistress. “My life feels like that of a mistress you only need when you want, but you never come to see how I am,” she lamented.
Her pain deepened during pregnancy, which she said she endured almost entirely alone, supported only by her mother. At seven months pregnant, Bahar surprised her with a birthday celebration — but the joy was overshadowed by the revelation that another of Bahar’s wives was also expecting a child. The news, she admitted, shattered her mental state.
Public Sympathy and Reflection
Helwa’s confession quickly drew sympathy from netizens, many of whom saw her story as a stark reminder of the emotional toll of siri marriages when not accompanied by responsibility and transparency.
She emphasized that her disclosure was not intended to tarnish anyone’s reputation but was driven by pain she could no longer contain. “Your flaws are no longer tolerable,” she wrote in her post.
A Lesson on Commitment
Her story serves as a cautionary tale about the importance of commitment, openness, and responsibility in relationships. Helwa hopes her experience will be a lesson for others not to take marriage lightly, especially when conducted outside the legal framework, leaving women vulnerable to neglect and emotional distress.****
